Okay, I tried and gave up several times trying to put together something that works. (I didn't quite give up after my last post.) I can't do it. I hate the numbers and the.dots() 449.x, 72 elseif COMPUTERS ARE SUPPOSED TO SPEAK OUR LANGUAGE!!! It's 2011, where's my fucking hovering robot monkey AI t...

It's har-rerd! Humans aren't supposed to think in code like this. I think can feel my brain turning into silicon. I'm going to post on craigslist for a programmer I can work with locally. . . There's lots of programmers out there with lots of free time they're willing to spend on a stranger's amateu...

By "parser", I'm talking about your code that turns text that the player has typed into events in the game. There's nothing I (or many other people) hate more than playing hunt-the-word. Or in other words, don't let this happen: >open the chest I don't see a "chest" here. >open ...

My primary advice is to not neglect your command parser. If you have gigahertz of processor cycles and thousands of megabytes of memory at your disposal, make sure the player has no problem doing anything (or, importantly, knowing what actions are available to them). If you need help here, I have s...

I'm making a text adventure game. It's a horribly neglected medium. Any focused tutorials concerning text and simple textual animations? I need some glow as well, have to have glow. Persistent data, obvs'. Multiple-choice and "next" is the only active player input, but I'd like to be able ...